sydney's sidewalk drawing...elijah, sydney, daddy, mommy, kezia

Friday, December 24, 2010

Comforted - No Small Miracle

We are still pregnant!
(that's the short version...)







the Long Version goes like this:






Fri. Dec. 10...BFP (big fat positive) on a pregnancy test! After months of trying, I had finally decided to trust God with the timing and try not to obsess the timing of our family.   I told Wayne by giving him a christmas snowman family ornament (the kind that you personalize) with a mom, dad and three little snowmen. what! he said, are we pregnant? yup. so excited and so overwhelmed! (it's funny how fast you can switch from we're having a baby! to oh, we need a mini-van, wayne will need to save up his vacation time, I'll have to get some newborn and small diapers, etc.) We had decided to wait until Feb. to tell family...two of the last four christmas's have had baby announcments, so we didn't want them to expect anything.






Wed. Dec. 15...I was giving the kids a bath, when I suddenly realized I was cramping pretty bad. I went to the ER that evening with lots of bleeding and cramps. the ultrasound didn't turn up anything definitive (which was kind of to be expected because we were only about 5 weeks long). Still, all my symptoms indicated a pending miscarriage. I have had one before, and this felt so similar, that I had no doubt in my mind that we were losing the baby. I even lost some rather large clots, again indicating a miscarriage. I went home and was told to come back in a couple days to do some blood work to confirm the pregnancy hormone (called hcg) numbers were going down appropriately. The paperwork I was given gave a diagnose of “Miscarriage Threatened”, but the doctor in the ER said it did not seem that this little baby was going to make it. I knew it was over, it was so like my first miscarriage, I had no doubts in my mind.










Thurs. Dec. 16...By morning my bleeding had nearly stopped, so it seemed that I was still retaining some "products of pregnancy" (love the medical terms, they are so cold). I talked with the doctor and he mentioned the possibility of needing a d&c if my body didn't expell everything naturally.










Fri. Dec. 17...Go in for my bloodwork...my poor veins didn't want to cooperate, so after getting gabbed in both arms, I finally had a finger prick to get some blood. I felt so light headed; I don't do blood or needles well. I heard back later in the afternoon...my hcg levels in the ER on Wed. had been at 3,300ish and my numbers today were 3,500ish...strangely up, but not the doubled numbers it should have been.  Again, signaling a non-viable pregnancy.






Still, I was so confused. Why did my numbers go up? I reasoned maybe since my body was holding on to "pregnancy products" that maybe my numbers kept rising ever so slightly. I again asked about d&c, I didn't need one after my first miscarriage so I was not familiar with the process or how long we could try to wait for my body to figure it out naturally. I was told waiting over the weekend and for a little while would be ok.






I was to go in again on Monday for more blood work. Somewhere in the back of my desperate mind I had been thinking, maybe we were going to have twins and we lost one so the number going up is reflecting pregnancy, but the smaller up is the equaling out between twins. I obviously have no medical background, but I was so confused about the numbers. The funny part was that my doctor, without my mentioning it, brought up the twins thing also, but he also mentioned that in his 20+ years, he had only seen that twice. So, I had to go into the weekend wondering what was going on, but still figured I had miscarried and that I would have to deal with waiting for my body to figure out what had happened and to regulate itself for a while.










Mon. Dec. 20...Went in for blood work; this time we hit a vein right away, thank goodness. I was told that if I didn't hear back from the office by 4, to give a call. I finally had a moment to call, but got an answering service saying that calls made after 4:30 would be answered the following day! DAH! It was 4:29 when I called. Thankfully, a nurse got back to me a little later.






"Your number is 8,000something, which is the kind of number we like to see at this stage of pregnancy; doubling every 2-3 days. The doctor would like you to come in on Wed. so we can do another blood test just to confirm and have an ultrasound to check for a heartbeat."














A what!?! I was thinking, do these people have access to my full chart!?! I’ve had a miscarriage! Err, haven’t I?

“what is going on” I asked, “I thought we had a miscarriage.” Basically, I needed to come in so we could do some more investigation. We told family, whom we had told last Wednesday that we had miscarried, that maybe there was something after all and to please pray. I spent the evening in shock and tried to tell myself not to get too hopeful…that sounds aweful, but I wanted to be happily surprised, not broken down again. I told my husband I was pessimistically optimistic.


“The scheduling department will call you tomorrow to set up appointments for Wed.”










Tues. Dec. 21…There was no way I was going to make it until Wed. to find out what was going on, and Wayne had the day off, so we asked if there were any openings for UltraSound today. After a bit of checking around, we got an appointment at 12:30. Family was a little too far away, and it was too short of notice to ask church friends to watch kiddos, so we all went.





I get on the bed, and the ultrasound begins. The monitor was turned to face the tech., since she would be looking for ridiculously small stuff, I’m sure she needed to concentrate/have easy access to the screen. Wayne hovered over her shoulder, and I kind of gave him a pleading stare down…do you see anything? He nodded. Baby? Again, a nod. Heartbeat? Yes






I was shocked. I finally asked the tech if there was anything in there. Yes! After a few more minutes, she had finished her measurements and swung the screen around. I had decided last Wed., when I saw nothing on the screen, that seeing a little heartbeat and baby on a monitor is probably the best sight in the world during pregnancy. I was right. Baby is little more than a blob with a heartbeat, but it is our blob and we love it to pieces.










I forget the term she used, but the nurse thought that maybe all the bleeding and cramping last Wed. had been from a blood blister formed during implantation that had released.






Whatever the reason for all that bleeding, we have a baby again. 






We have an estimated due date of Aug. 17, 2011.

Saturday, December 18, 2010

the God of all comfort



Sorry for the break in posts...I don't know where the time is getting to.

Because I know you all care for our family, I wanted to share with you and ask for your prayers. 

I had another miscarriage this past Wednesday.  We were only about 5 weeks along.  I had just found out a few days before, but was already super excited and dreaming of feeling the kicks and prods I would feel from the inside.  I had already begun making mental lists of all the things I would have to do.
It's amazing how we can know someone for so short a time, yet be completely in love.
I miss you baby.

The next day while listening to our local christian station, I heard the "Q Verse of the Day", 2 Corinthians 1:3-4, and knew I had all I needed,  The God of All Comfort, and that this time would serve a purpose, to comfort others with the same comfort God has given me.

Jesus is my comfort.

Praise
be to the
God and Father
of our Lord
Jesus Christ,
the Father of compassion
and the God of all comfort,
who comforts us in all our troubles,
so that we can comfort those in any trouble
with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.
2 Corinthians 1:3-4

I've got my verse, and my song...
We sang this song a lot in college and I always really liked it.

Sunday, November 21, 2010

foundations

1 Corinthians 3:10-15
But whoever is building on this foundation must be very careful. For no one can lay any other foundation than the one we already have--Jesus Christ. Now anyone who builds on that foundation may use gold, silver, jewels, wood, hay, or straw. But there is going to come a time of testing at the judgment day to see what kind of work each builder has done. Everyone's work will be put through the fire to see whether or not it keeps its value.
If the work survives the fire, that builder will receive a reward. But if the work is burned up, the builder will suffer great loss. The builders themselves will be saved, but like someone escaping through a wall of flames.



Our missionary from missions conference shared the above verse with us this past sunday during his sermon. He told of a new construction building in the country where he works that had been undercontruction most of the four years his family had been there. It was recently discovered to have been constructed improperly and to be unfit for use. This huge, nearly complete building that changed the skyline and was meant to provide jobs and so much more, is useless as it currently stands.
He then shared the above verses.
As Christians, our lives and deeds are built on the foundation of Jesus Christ. Some deeds are like gold, silver and beautiful jewels. Some deeds are wood, hay, and straw. I have a 'sneaking suspicion' that many of my building projects lately have been of staw and hay...not even wood.
I sat in church thinking of how much I didn't want my deeds to be worthless and made of worthless things that have no lasting value. And then I realized I was still thinking of ME! sheesh, I am so messed up and self-centered.
Jesus, be the center, foundation, builder, finisher and completer of my life. Let your name be glorified.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

You must remain faithful to the things you have been taught. You know they are true, for you know you can trust those who taught you.
You have been taught the holy Scriptures from childhood, and they have given you the wisdom to receive the salvation that comes by trusting in Christ Jesus.
2 Timothy 3:14-15

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

inspired by openness

is it ok for christians to struggle?
is it acceptable to be angry, frustrated, hurt, confused? at God?

This life on earth is hard...yet we spend so much time pretending that we've got it together!  God has really been orchestrating events in our lives lately...conversations, sermons, songs, even blogs, to remind us of our need for Him in our daily life as well as our need of fellowwhip with other christians. 
We're not lone ranger christians or superheros with no vulnerabilities. 

A college friend of mine just posted about some of the struggles she has been having and I was so blessed to read it.  While the details differ, I've felt a lot of those same emotions and struggles.  I was inspired by her openness.  For months now, I've been meaning to get more of myself onto the blog, but haven't had a chance.  (Even now, I should be packing for a trip!)   I've never been much of a journal person (except on missions trips), but am hoping that maybe posting more of my thoughts and what I am learning would be good for me and others as well.

I'm not the writer my friend is.  I don't "have it all together" and I often forget to keep God's perspective in my life.  But hopefully, in the next few weeks and months, I'll be able to allow God to work through some of the areas in my life that need serious fixing or replacing and post what I am learning.

One quick area is my need for companionship.  I'm not talking about with my husband (although he is 1 of the 3 most important guys in my life [the others being my son and my father]), I'm talking about fellowship with other christians in the body.  Sunday morning just isn't enough, and I am glad that I am realizing that!  Still not sure what God is working on in this area of my life...what the end results will be, but so far I have been amazingly blessed to have found a few ladies online that I chat with here and there who also understand the significance and need of God in their lives.  The worldly view of self as most important gets really old and discouraging...and impractical when you have little kids!  It is refreshing to remember Jesus first and to learn to let all the other things in life fall into place based on a biblical worldview.



well, that turned out to be rather rambling, but as a female person, I think sometimes I just need to talk it out!

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Kill Code

I've got to share this funny story.

Over the summer, Wayne and I hosted a small group bible study called The Truth Project (awesome, by the way).  It references a documentary called Unlocking the Mysteries of Life a few times in some of the segments.  I thought it would be nice to watch this dvd as well and took the kids to the library one day to see if it was available.
I go to the row of computers used for the library catalog.  I type in "Unlocking the Mysteries of Life," the computer begins to whirr and search, then...turned off!  I thought hmm, must have had it's timer run out, or needs to reset.  I go to the next computer down, type in "Unlocking the Mysteries of Life" and again, it begins to search, then turns off!  I think to myself haha, it must be a kill code for the computers...or, it's a conspiracy, they don't want people to know the truth! hahaha.  
I go to the next computer, and I am not lying, it does it again!!!  Upon typing in "Unlocking the Mysteries of Life" the computer just dies!  Holy Cow, it IS a kill code, it IS a conspiracy!  Then I look down in time to see Sydney pushing the power button on the computer's tower which is stored below the computer table.  Good grief...there's a conspiracy all right, it is named Sydney-Trouble-Maker.  I quickly go back, turn all the computers back on, hoping they automatically reboot and go to the right page for catalog search and drag the kiddos to a more inconspicuous location with a library catalog computer, set Sydney on the table top itself so little fingers cannot cause porblems and type in my search words.  whew, the computer lives!!!!    But also does not have the documentary Unlocking the Mysteries of Life.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

anderson family photo attempt


So we have not had any good family photos in a long time...like 8 months long!
So, I wanted to take some nice photos today at church, we wore coordinating colors and I even remembered to charge the camera...but we didn't have time to grab anyone at church to take a few shots for us.  Which means we had to use the timer for wayne and I and set the camera on the porch railing...it seemed to work ok for us...3 photos later, we had one that was good enough.

the kiddos on the other hand were another story...70 pictures later, these are what I got.






this one actually turned out cute as separate photos of the kids, cropped in close.




look this way...no, no, turn around...over here!!!

Ee-wy-jah...wook ober der!

elijah and daddy...awe, cute!

Sydney and mommy...awe, cute too!

sydney, smile normal!!!   "cheeeeeese!!!"



come on!! can I get one nice picture of the both of you!!!



wrong way, guys!!!




I'm done!!!!



sad to say, but this is one of the better pictures because I can see both of their face and they are both in focus...maybe we'll try more next week.


Sept 25 grandma & grandpa kaemi visit


Abby and Kaemi came to visit Grandma and Grandpa F., so the kiddos and I went down to visit as well.

Elijah and Grandpa hamming it up.

Trying to get all three kids to look the same way...never gonna happen.  We went to a friend's house that had grown some enormous pumkins...200-600 lbs!
"Hey you kids, over here!!!"

Kaemi was mesmerized by the large pumkins, but spent most of her time hanging out by the little pumkins.


A little size perspective...Sydney and one of the largest pumkins.


below is the closest I got to all three kids looking the same way




After a while, Elijah and grandpa supervised from the side...


Then we went to a play ground.
"Elijah, come out!" You can't get me!

 awww...grandparent love...

then we went out for some lunch...and some frozen dairy product (code words for ICE CREAM!)
Elijah definitely appreciated the handouts from grandpa...
 ...and while Kaemi was happy with her ice cream...

...she didn't seem to quite graps the proper cone technique.

That is not how you do it, Kaemi.

All in all, a fun and exciting day with the family.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

coolest hat ever

I saw a costume of the three eyed alien from Toy Story and thought, aww, that is soo cute, Elijah would look soo cool.  I think I could make that hat...so I did.




SputnikFest

You read right,
SputnikFest.

In 1962, a chunk of Sputnik fell onto a street in Manitowoc.  It was dismissed by local police at first as being some slag from a local foundry.  They later connected it with the burn-up of Sputnik IV.  The next year, a metal ring was embedded in the road to mark it's landing.
A few years ago, some locals thought it would be funny to commemorate Manitowoc's link with the space age with a festival...so, this year was the 3rd annual SputnikFest.  And yes, it is supposed to be cheesey and funny.  Activities included space pet costume contest, cake decorating contest and even a Miss Space Debris Pagent.  Hey, I told you it was cheesey.

Still, we had a fun time attending SputnikFest earlier this month, and thought I'd share a few pics.



There's where it landed...the white paint is the lane marker, so the festival, which closed down the street, is one of your few options to get an up close and personal picture of history!

video


Thursday, September 9, 2010

I say, a LOG-PULLER!!!

The title is for my dad.  :-)  A good Fletcher will know what movie this quote is from.

Can you fit a tree into your car?  Specifically a Chevy Cavalier?  Well, we can fit a tree into our car.


It started with this maple-ish tree in the front yard.

It was stuck growing up shadowed and practically under two enormous evergreens that are probably in the 40 ft tall range.  It was a poor looking thing that was growing all wonky due to lack of sunlight and the imposing evergreens.  So, we cut her down.



yup, even I helped.
love the oh so stylish head gear!

grrr, cut you dull blade!

the peanut (or rather cheerio) gallery was safe on the sidewalk in front of our house. (yes, that is sydney with a swim ring and bath ducky in a office chair in our front yard in 58 degree weather).

Our car was the LOG-PULLER of the day.